Operator: S.E.M.C. what’s your emergency?
Caller: Some guy just got his arm ripped off.
Operator: Excuse me?
Caller: His arm, lady. His whole churning arm!
Operator: Is he still alive?
Caller: Yes, he’s sitting right here.
Operator: He shouldn’t be sitting up, lay him down and put pressure on the wound.
Caller: Ok, hang on. Hey buddy, they said you should be laying down.
Inaudible muttering
Caller: He said when he’s done with his whiskey.
Operator(Sigh): Is the assailant still there?
Caller: Yea, he’s drinking too.
Operator: Can you describe him?
Caller: He’s a Grangor, gray, big cloth over his eyes…
Operator: He’s a what?
Caller: Grangor.
Operator: Is that a religious thing?
Caller: You know, a big cat person.
Operator: He owns a lot of cats?
Caller: No, he is a cat.
Operator: Oh he thinks he’s people! I have a little guy like that. Sometimes he sits in a chair during dinner and so I give him a plate and silverware and–
Caller: Is there someone else I could talk to?
Operator: I’m the only one here. They all went to a call about some kid yelling into minions mouths so loud they blew up.
Caller: Churn, what do I then?
Operator: Well, is the arm intact?
Caller: Yea, it’s on the table.
Operator: You need to put it on ice.
Caller: How much ice should I put in the box?
Operator: 479.
Caller: Mother churner, ok….
Caller puts phone down. Banging, yelling and growling is heard
Caller: Can’t. The Grangor is keeping it.
Operator: The cat is keeping the arm.
Caller: As a trophy.
Operator: Can you take it by force?
Caller (delirious laughter): No way, lady. That guy is way OP. Just come when you can, these two are getting the dice out again. I’m gonna watch.
END OF CALL